Worst Episode... EVER!
So, the next time you have the flu, and a friend who works at a Video Store brings over a copy of Gigli... don't tell yourself "Hey, it's free... and it's not like you were going to run a marathon." because this movie is only going to make you sicker. Seriously.
I thought the critics must have been a little harsh on this film, but now I think they went a little too easy on it. It was horrific. BRUTAL. There are four things about this movie that got me to the end credits:
1. Bragging Rights. It's like eating a dozen cheeseburgers or drinking a Big Gulp Slurpee in 10 minutes... not everyone's done it, so you can show it off.
2. The Handicapped Kid. Yes... the mentally handicapped 'Rain Man' rip-off character had more depth than just about anyone in this movie... there are two exceptions, and I'm about to get to them. This kid... with his drooling and nonesense speaking parts made J-Lo and Ben look stupid. Nuff said.
3. Al Pacino. HOOWAH!! This guy could make anything cooler and scarier. Bonus points for having the only kill in the film. He didn't take a flamethrower to the place though
4. The "Walken". I stopped calling him 'Christopher Walken' after the cowbell sketch because I felt it undermined his legendary status. This guy is like genious on speed. He crushed a coffee cup, and I was interested. Then he started yelling about ice cream, and I was interested. Then he left the scene, and I wept and prayed for his return. It didn't happen... I think God is taunting me.
So, to boil this down again... if you have a few hours to kill... the film is free... you get some sort of sick pleasure out of watching bad movies... and you want to brag to others who get a sick pleasure out of watching bad movies, you'll still want to think twice about this one. Think at least twice. Make that three times. No, better yet... don't watch it at all. Drink a bottle of Tequila and go to bed. You'll feel better in the morning... trust me.